Though we disclaim the entire Harry Potter universe, we do own the
copyrights to our songs and respective poetic and musical material,
and reserve all rights thereof.  We will post the lyrics to our 
other songs as well.  The songs will appear on this page in 
alphabetical order, not necessarily corresponding to whatever 
chronological order they might be published or released in.  If it
 becomes simpler to make a page of lyrics for each album, we will
do so as necessity surfaces.
Newest Song Addition: T-7-15-08, "The Power of Friendship"

HERMIONE

You may say that nargles don’t infest mistletoe
You may think that there’s nothing sane about Xeno
You may think the Quibbler’s a load of rubbish
But for you this is my wish

CHORUS:
Open up your mind
Her-my-o-knee
In time you will see it’ll be good for you
Open up your mind
Her-my-o-knee
Profess your faith in Snorkacks like you know you want to

You may say I’m crazy ’cause I can see thestrals
But I think I can see as you secretly wrestle with yourself
You may make great potions and spells but your doubt is a hell for you
This is what I want you to do

CHORUS

Wit beyond measure is man’s greatest treasure
You should have come to Ravenclaw 
With that narrow mind of yours
But instead you chose to be in Gryffindor

CHORUS

 

I WANT A WEASLEY SWEATER

I want a Weasley sweater
You’d think they might remember
How I helped Ginny with her broken ankle
Oh, yes, I want a Weasley sweater
Mrs. Weasley should know better
They ought to keep in touch with me so the Weasleys I must rankle

CHORUS:
You owe me several Christmas sweaters
You should bestow me with those stupid sweaters
With an ‘L’ where you always put an ‘H’ for Harry Potter
I’m Ginny’s friend too
And I want a Weasley sweater from you

Every time, I am forgotten
I’m always picked butt last
You’d think that I was an enormous pain in the ass
All I want’s to be remembered
At the most wonderful time of the year
I want a Weasley sweater or I may shed a tear

MIDDLE EIGHT

CHORUS x2

 

LOSER’S LURGY

Flying around and around the Quidditch pitch
Is that Hufflepuff Chaser Zacharias Smith
He really is quite the cynic and he’s a really bad sport
He doesn’t believe Harry Potter, that little trendwhore

CHORUS:
I get a standing ovation for the Quidditch commentary
McGonagall’s frustration is quite contrary to the mood
Ginny Weasley is very nice and as a Quidditch star she is emerging
And Zacharias Smith has got a bad case of Loser’s Lurgy 

Smith makes fun of Harry whenever he can
He wants to make Harry feel like less of a man
He doesn’t know the power of the Expelliarmus
But Harry said it helped him kick Voldemort’s butt

MIDDLE EIGHT:
Loser’s Lurgy, Loser’s Lurgy…I suspect that nargles are behind it!

CHORUS x2

 

MY HOUSE IS WEIRD

I live with my dad
He’s the best I ever had
Since I was nine
But we are doing fine

I fish for Freshwater Plimpies
And we drink Gurdyroots
And then we eat the Plimpies

Our house is shaped like a rook
Just like a kingside castle
I go fishing down by the brook
It’s really no hassle

CHORUS:
Merlin’s beard, my house is weird
Our kitchen appliances make a perfectly round room
Merlin’s beard, my house is weird
So I painted Neville’s picture in my room

My dad is recreating the diadem
In our living room we’ve got a real gem
It’s the horn of a Crumple-Horned Snorkack
But I’ll have to wait to see it till I get back 

CHORUS

 

NEVILLE NEVILLE NEVER

All alone in your dormitory
Being brave like a Gryffindor should
Oh my darling, can’t you see the glory
Of Voldemort being trampled for good?

I know you’re waiting for the next D.A. meeting
Just like me, my love
We can’t be afraid of the Carrows’ tough beatings
We must steal the sword and rise above

CHORUS:
Oh, Nevile, Neville my dear
Lean in close to me so my secret you might hear
I never thought in all my days that I’d love such a loser but I guess that it pays
And Neville, Neville, never forget me

All alone to deal with Snape
Another cauldron melted, Neville, is it your eighth?
But it doesn’t matter because now I know
That even though you’re not that bright I want you as a beau

CHORUS

I know you tend to forget your Remembrall
I know you can’t remember what to remember at all
Just try to remember that these brains want that heart
Oh, Neville, Neville, darling, till death do us part

CHORUS

 

 

THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP

I don’t want to be an oddity…
I don’t want you to call me Loony…
I just want to be me…
(I just want to be me…)

Harry survived Voldemort once
(So why couldn’t he do it again?)
Stop thinking like Muggles or we’ll all be in trouble––
(Voldy underestimates the power of friends)

Hermione and Ron
(Were the first friends Harry stumbled upon)
And though they have thick skulls we love them so;
(I like Ginny)
She’s very nice,
(And she is very powerful with magic, you know)

CHORUS:
Come on, folks, this is magic that we’re dealing with
(I mean, what the frig, why don’t you care when so much crap could go down here?)
Don’t you believe this evidence (or would you rather cleave to deception?)
Even though it isn’t fair
(Even if the whole wizarding world plunges into despair)
I have friends, (oh yes, I have friends)

Harry knows best
(Daddy thinks that Fudge must be possessed)
Harry’s right, let’s continue our fight against this Voldy-tastic plight
(Neville’s so hot)
Oh, did I say that aloud?
(Well magic is might, he’s my shining knight, and we’re going nargle-hunting tonight!!!)

CHORUS

You know, even though Unbridge is a festering turd
She’s a wicked witch, (oh, yes, she’s one sick bitch)
And all the good teachers are so far out of the school
To Dumbledore, ourselves we swore
And Cornelius Fudge is corpulent, not cool

CHORUS

Neville is hot, yeah, it’s out there now…
Maybe the Gryffindor in him will kick in and do me proud…
Neville’s so, so hot, I love how he’s a prude…
With friends and Neville by my side, Voldemort, go yourself screw!!!!

THE SORCERERS STONED

Harry, did you ever wonder why Voldemort’s eyes are so damn red?
Harry, don’t you sometimes question what the Dark Lord’s doing in your head?
Harry, did you ever wonder where Dumbledore was most of your sixth year?
To me the answer seems quite clear!

Voldemort wanted to be sober when he killed you
He wanted your parents in his thrall
But when he tried to do you in he lost his powers
‘Cause he was going through withdrawals

VOLDY CHORUS:
The greatest wizards in the world shall have their true story unfurled
Better than Veritaserum could construe
The greatest wizards in the land are making potions that have been long banned
It’s not the life Ron’s mother wants for you
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
That Mundungus Fletcher is enabling
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
To Dumbledore your education is for tabling

Dumbledore doesn’t think you’re worth staying sober for
Even though he’s your father figure
The Headmaster is totally plastered
And he’s got himself a Whomping Willow reefer

DUMBLEDORE CHORUS:
The greatest wizards in the world shall have true their story unfurled
’Cause the truth is they’re wasted through and through
The greatest wizards in the land are making potions that have been long banned
Severus Snape is selling all kinds of goo to
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
The Order of the Phoenix is a disaster
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
Mad-Eye Moody’s heart is beating fast and faster

Remus Lupin sometimes thinks he’s a wolf
He used to smoke behind the school with Sirius and James
He might attack you, ’cause he’s just so messed up
But all the other Marauders were just the same

LUPIN CHORUS:
The greatest wizards in the world shall have their true story unfurled
’Cause it’s not fair for them to teach in school
The greatest wizards in the land are making potions that have been long banned
It started when Grindelwald thought he could be cool
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
The Death Eaters are popping pills
The Sorcerers Stoned, the Sorcerers Stoned,
Even Harry Potter’s growing gills